Friday, June 01, 2007

25 Self-Destructive Thoughts

The following is a list of 25 self-destructive thoughts that have outlived their psychological usefulness – if they ever had any to begin with – in helping me live a happy, fufilling and balanced life.

My goal is to train myself to stop giving these knee-jerk nuggets the credence of legitimacy.

1. I don’t deserve to be happy because I haven’t suffered enough.

2. I have no right to complain and I should feel guilty for doing so.

3. I should be ashamed of myself for not buying into the Protestant work ethic.

4. Enjoy happiness while it lasts because things will turn to shit soon enough.

5. No one would like or love me if they knew who I really was.

6. It’s only a matter of time before everyone I care about figures this out.

7. I can’t fall in love without comparing myself unfavorably to the person I love.

8. I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I wasn’t pissed off about
something.

9. Everything is fucked.

10. Shit happens even when it doesn’t have to because I’m too lazy to avoid it.

11. My way of thinking is doomed to extinction and deservedly so.

12. The universe meant for me to be alone.

13. My inability to sleep is due to chronic laziness during waking hours.

14. My pragmatic, mitigation-based approach to living is nothing more than a cop-out borne of fear.

15. I should be ashamed of myself for trying to take the easy road.

16. People who have passion for their work are better than me.

17. My anxiety is a character flaw.

18. I know what other people think about me.

19. I’m bound to find a way to fuck things up.

20. I’m not capable of expressing my emotions appropriately.

21. If I let myself get angry, I won’t be able to stop being angry.

22. Beating myself up over mistakes and wrongdoings is the only way to hold myself accountable.

23. I’m never going to get better at handling my feelings.

24. I am slowly squandering away my existence.

25. I can’t adopt a more positive mindset without giving into the uncontemplative “fascism of happy thoughts” espoused by the motivational-industrial complex.

3 comments:

Wyatt Brand said...

I think I know you pretty well - and I thoughtfully answered 'false' to each of these (in regards to you). The fact that you have been able to identify these thoughts, type them down, and post them on your own internet door like Martin Luther, says to me that you are truly ready to leave them behind.

Rachel said...

Here's an exercise. . .Now make a list of '25 things that I like about myself.' You CAN do this. And by doing so, you'll automatically start forgetting the baloney on that first list!

Branka said...

Well...you described my behavioural patterns extremely well...I so want to change them...post again if you find out how that can be done